How can these wet blankets call themselves patriots?

According to the Daily Herald of Everett — in the Pacific Northwest state of Washington — neighbors of Naval Station Everett complained about a recent change the military installation made in regards to its speaker system.

A few weeks back they found that the volume was too weak for emergency notifications and below the standard set for U.S. Navy bases — so they made it louder. In addition, they changed the morning bugle call from “Call to Colors” to the national anthem, which the branch requires to be played everyday at 8 a.m.

The 30% increase in volume apparently was much too much for some local residents (we’re assuming non-grunge fans?) so they made a huge stink about it. The base compromised, and lowered it 10%, which they say is still strong enough to meet the needed requirement.

While opinions differ on the issue, one can most certainly make the argument that the early star-spangled ode can serve as an alarm clock, and not just for the brave men and women serving our country but for everyone who enjoys the freedom bestowed upon them from the aforementioned heroes’ sacrifices.

Allow Bubb Rubb — noted American and proud Oakland, California resident — to elaborate the point through a (somewhat) similar wakeup call known as a “whistle tip”: