Before we dive into the meat and potatoes of this post, let’s pose this question so we can ultimately put it on the shelf: is it uncouth for a man to attend a baby shower?

Talk amongst yourselves.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s seamlessly segue into the purpose for tossing out this query.

Recently, a United States Army Specialist filled out a leave request form to attend — you guessed it! — a baby shower. Yes, the soldier was of the male persuasion.

In true macho fashion, his commanding officer denied him the vacay citing “MEN DONT GO TO BABY SHOWERS” as his reason for the refusal.

So, the skunked soldier accepted the minor defeat, embraced the proverbial left hook to his future plans, and answered the bell in a way that would make even Jack Handy proud (along with all of us — it’s that good).

Here’s a photograph of the first request form followed by the rebuttal (via Reddit):

soldier leave request form

If it’s difficult to read, here’s the text:

Going home to Appalachian mountains to drink whiskey, wrestle bears, and shoot lots of guns. I also plan to grow out a beard, chop down a hundred trees with my axe and eat 10lbs of thick cut bacon with my wife, whom I plan to have lots of unprotected sex with, because I am a man that’s just what we do. Football.

No word on whether or not he finally got approval. If his commander is a soccer fan, he might be screwed.

Task & Purpose