Blake Hall
War. War never changes.
Even if that war is just getting your hands on a AAA video game and keeping your hard-won facial hair.
No one knows struggle more than Army EOD technician Tyler Anderson, who crowdfunded the humble sum of $60 to purchase his own copy of Fallout 4.
What is Fallout 4, you say? Just the most anticipated video game of 2014, no big deal.
The game, which came out Nov. 10, takes place in an alternate future that juxtaposes a 1950’s aesthetic with a post-nuclear fallout wasteland. The player character (who can be a military veteran if you choose the male option) is enjoying a sunny day at home with their spouse, infant son and robot butler when they learn that nuclear holocaust is imminent. The player and their family escape the bombs and run to an underground bunker, where they are cryogenically frozen for 200 years.
The story truly starts when the player defrosts and emerges from the bunker to find a world recovering from the war that blew civilization apart. The player is then free to explore this new world in whatever fashion they like, whether it be in a clean, charisma-boosting tuxedo or in a heavily-armed suit of power armor.
The benefits of owning this game are multitude, but Anderson had a personal stake. According to his now-removed GoFundMe page, Anderson’s “tyrant wife has not only forced me to shave my upper-lip best friend but now she will not allow me to purchase Fallout 4.”
Buying the game, Anderson said, would help him get over the loss of his mustache and “escape from my boring life for about 1 – 2 hours a night and to pursue my other passion.” That passion being blowing the heads off of mutants and hoarding as much junk as his player character can carry.
According to screenshots, Anderson raised $75 in three hours. However, the GoFundMe page is gone. Task and Purpose postulates that his wife found it.
War. War never changes.